Monday, September 19, 2011

Excuses, Excuses, Excuses

I've never heard so many excuses for homework not being done. Every day a plethora of children rattled off their reasons for not completing two minutes of math and fifteen minutes of reading. I listen, pull a very sorry face, say, "That's a bummer!", and then tell each child, one by one, to put their name on the board to stay in recess to complete that homework. (My fellow teacher talked to a parent at the end of school today who is going to file a complaint with the school district against her. Why? Because she made the student stay in to complete homework. Heaven forbid that someone should teach children about responsibility!) I've decided to write a few of the more memorable excuses.

1.  "I couldn't write. I hurt my left thumb." "But you write with your right hand." "Oh!"
2.  "I couldn't do my homework because my cat hid my homework folder." "Cat's don't hide folders." "Yah, but they hide things."
3.  "My mom hid the folder with my math in it." "Why?" "Because she was punishing me for not doing the homework when she told me to." "When do you get your folder back?" "When my homework is finished. But, my homework is in the folder." (Later found out that was true.)
4.  "I was at my grandma's house all night." "Why didn't you do your homework there?" "She doesn't have anything to write with." "Surely she has a pencil or pen." "Nope. When the police came with the search warrant they took EVERYTHING." "They wouldn't take a pencil." "Yes they do if they are looking for fingerprints."
5.  "I couldn't read. It was too dark." "Why didn't you turn on a light?" "I couldn't." "Why?" "I was hiding because I was in trouble."

Oh I am so looking forward to tomorrow and more delightful excuses. This may be a VERY long year!

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